Know Flow enemies!

This is an excerpt from my Coaching Power Tool Flow vs. Effort published at International Coach Academy. The original article can be found here.

Excessive effort opens the list. Oxford Dictionary defines Effort as: “A vigorous or determined attempt;” also, “Strenuous physical or mental exertion.” Vigorous, Strenuous, Exertion – each word in the definition of Effort even sounds like great effort!

Here is how Effort manifests itself in everyday living.

Endless to-do lists, stemmed from the lost priorities, lay the foundation for agitation and turmoil, as they will hardly ever be executed. They are like an old, shabby bag with the handle torn-off and lost ages ago: awkward to carry, yet unbearable to let go. Meanwhile, sitting on those bags are goal-oriented, determined professionals, who at some point became prone to competitiveness and greed for accomplishments (aka overachievers) and then ended up with too many priorities. Soon, however, an unapproachable behemoth of permanent “busyness” shows its grin. It is so sad, as those individuals are usually the creative types who would have otherwise contributed fascinating ideas for mankind. Nonetheless, often overloaded with endless ideas, they lose focus, and even passion, sabotaging their entire lives. Meanwhile, focus and passion, as we shall further discover, are major components of flow.

What inevitably follows the strenuous to-do lists is procrastination. We procrastinate with urgent or important tasks that for various reasons don’t seem appealing. So instead, we pretend something else needs our attention this very moment, even if it’s a tiny bit more tolerable and promises a short break. As if out of the blue, the garage that seemed to be totally fine for the last few months, if not years, suddenly needs cleaning, although the tedious report’s deadline is tomorrow. Whereas such “impostor” duty might generate brief pleasure or satisfaction, the unbearable background noise will be constantly bugging us reminding something critical is still due. Then again, we do not fully enjoy the action, so no flow here.

Although effort is mostly associated with forceful action required to move us to our goals, passive, idle, or meaningless existence, aka time killers, (e.g., browsing social media with no particular purpose or switching channels on autopilot) is in its core a tedious, albeit fruitless, effort to gain gratification. We wade through this cruel jungle hunting for rest and fulfillment but finding none. Even worse, such empty preoccupation builds stress and tension. This kind of “relaxation” is deceptive, and along with the exertion it clamors for, it deprives our bodies of productivity, our minds of peace, and our souls of joy. It is also some sort of procrastination in its essence and has nothing to do with nourishment and restoration flow gives.

In the meantime, one of the most notorious representatives of excessive, unnecessary effort, especially in the professional arena, is Multitasking. Some multitasking gurus “manage” to work (or so they believe) on critical reports whilst on a call or during meetings. The result is terrible – reckless typos or even crucial errors, not to mention endless fatigue. After several hours of vain attempts to finish work while being bombarded by phone calls, emails, and texts, can anyone claim that this was a fulfilling, meaningful work? Probably not, and even if the initial goal was accomplished – the suffering it caused, the depletion it left after will never justify the means.

Flow and multitasking are on opposite sides of the barricades. Whenever they meet – multitasking instantly kills the flow. Think about it: to get back on track with the main task after switching from a popped-up text or email would take twice as long than if there were no disruption. Not only are we less productive and continuously disengaged when multitasking, but we also become drained and stressed out so much faster. As a side note, even computers cannot tackle two or more operations simultaneously. What seems like a parallel procedure, in reality, is a rapid shift between the commands undetectable by the human eye.

“The Myth of Multitasking: How” by Dave Crenshaw was published back in 2008 [2]. Daniel Goleman’s studies on the importance of focus and mindfulness [3] have been out in the world for decades. Astonishingly, it seems like scientists and the rest of humanity are on different planets. Many companies even now indicate multitasking as a requirement in their job descriptions… Numerous studies have proved – multitasking fails!

On a deeper level, multitasking exemplifies some form of procrastination, a legit excuse to quit boring tasks and somehow get through the unbearably long day. Multitasking is by far the worst enemy of engagement. And without full engagement, it’s next to impossible to reach flow.

Those are just a few examples of a great deal of effort we put into our daily existence. But why so much effort? Isn’t life supposed to be a play full of joy as great minds preach? Flow is riddled with hurdles and rapids:

  • Old habits and underlying beliefs inherited from parents or forced by society norms push us into pursuing someone else’s dreams. Hence, we bear with constant mediocracy and hardly stand our jobs.
  • Low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, the “yes-man” syndrome, people-pleasing… Needy for praise, we multitask or take on more than we could handle for our bosses and colleagues do so too.
  • Creeping in automatic negative thoughts such as: now or never; life is a persisting hardship full of uncertainty; to lessen the burden requests a lot of work and total control. Such thoughts cause a knee-jerk reaction – we jump into reckless action without pausing;
  • From kindergarten to graduate programs, where arrogance, perfectionism, and achievements for their own sake make us substitute performance for learning. We compete and compare, though, never experience and appreciate.

None of the above behavioral patterns or beliefs are aligned with the nurturing, empowering sensation of being in the flow.

Picture credits: pixaby.com